Dementia Care at Home: A Family's Guide for Calgary

The first time your mother forgot your name, or your father got lost driving a route he had known for thirty years, something shifted in you. Maybe there is a diagnosis now. Maybe you are still waiting for answers. Either way, you are likely reading this late at night, wondering how to keep someone you love safe in their own home. Take a breath. Thousands of Alberta families are walking this same road, and there are practical things you can do, starting this week.

You are not alone in this

As of January 1, 2025, the Alzheimer Society of Canada estimates that 771,939 people in Canada are living with dementia, and more than 414 people develop it every day. The Society also projects that Alberta will see a 286 per cent increase in people living with dementia between 2020 and 2050. Behind each number is a family learning as it goes, just like yours.

One point matters from the start: diagnosis and treatment belong to your parent’s doctor and, if they have one, their Alberta Health Services case manager. Home care is not medical care. What it does well is support daily living: routines, meals, personal care, companionship, safety. That support is often what makes staying at home possible.

Routine and a familiar home do real work

The Alzheimer Society of Canada teaches that keeping a routine helps a person with dementia keep doing things on their own, and that a familiar environment helps them stay connected to their past and to who they are. In plain terms: the same wake-up time, the same breakfast spot, the same evening walk. Schedule harder tasks, like bathing, for the time of day your parent functions best, and keep to lifelong patterns. If they always bathed in the morning, keep bath time in the morning.

Keep the home familiar too. Big changes can confuse; small fixes protect. Secure loose rugs, improve lighting to cut confusing shadows, lock away cleaning products and medications, and check for doors that could lock by accident. Aim for the balance the Society describes: safe enough to prevent harm, free enough to protect independence and dignity.

Talk shorter, softer, and side by side

Communication changes with dementia, but connection does not have to. A few techniques from the Alzheimer Society go a long way:

• Keep sentences short and simple. Offer easy choices instead of open questions: “Coffee or tea?”
• Stay in their line of sight, keep steady eye contact, and talk in a calm, quiet room.
• Show while you say. Gestures and facial expressions carry meaning when words get slippery.
• Do not argue with their reality. If your Lola (grandmother) insists she must get home to cook for her children, correcting the facts will only upset her. Respond to the feeling instead: “You always took such good care of everyone. Tell me about your kitchen in Manila.”

If confusion or new suspicions suddenly get much worse, call their doctor. The Alzheimer Society notes that changes like these can have a physical cause, such as a urinary tract infection, so it is worth ruling out.

Plan for wandering before it ever happens

Six in ten people with dementia become lost at some point, often without warning. Planning ahead is not overreacting; it is love with a checklist.

• Keep car keys, jackets and outdoor shoes out of sight.
• Move door locks above eye level or out of sight, and consider a door alarm.
• Keep a simple diary of when and where restlessness happens and look for patterns.
• Build movement into every day: a walk, light chores, time in the garden.
• Tell trusted neighbours what is going on, and keep a recent photo handy.
• Ask about the MedicAlert Safely Home program, which helps identify a person who has gone missing and return them home safely.

If your parent does go missing, search close by right away. If you have not found them within 15 minutes, call 911 and tell the operator they have dementia.

Burnout is a warning light, not a weakness

Every year, family and friends in Canada provide more than 580 million hours of care to people living with dementia. If you are exhausted, short-tempered, sleeping badly or getting sick more often, that is not failure. It is a signal.

The Alzheimer Society’s advice is blunt: take regular breaks before you are too exhausted to plan them, and remember that asking for help is not a sign of inadequate caregiving. Respite care exists for exactly this. A trained caregiver steps in for an afternoon, a night, or a week, so you can rest and come back as a daughter or son again, not just a care manager.

Where home care fits in

Non-medical home care picks up the daily-living side: gentle routines and reminders, meals, personal care, overnight support, and steady companionship. At KapwaCare, dementia and memory support is one of our core services. Our caregivers are employees, never gig workers: trained, insured and supervised, with a coordinator you can actually reach. Care is available in English and Tagalog, which can mean everything when an elder’s first language rises back to the surface. And you meet your caregiver before care starts, so day one is not a stranger at the door.

Our close-knit team is guided by kapwa (kuh-PWA), the Filipino value of shared humanity, and you can read more about what kapwa means to us. On the money side, we are registered for Alberta’s CDHCI program and bill Alberta Blue Cross directly, so AHS-approved hours can be $0 out-of-pocket. Our guide to how CDHCI works and our costs and funding page explain the details.

Not sure it is time yet? Our article on the signs it may be time for home care can help you think it through. When you are ready, start with a few hours of respite or book a free assessment, or call (403) 830-9600. We call back within the hour, 8am to 6pm, Monday to Saturday, and we will listen first. You do not have to do this alone, and you were never meant to.